Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Sunday, July 6, 2014
Got that Summertime, Summertime Fatness
Dear Summer,
While we have learned to love our bodies and we welcome the thigh-chafing temperatures that you bring, we do not welcome the body shaming, slut shaming, and strict dress codes that are socially imposed upon us during the season. They are a glaring reminder of what happens more subtly all year long.
We used to dread the gifts you would bring - the excessive heat, crippling humidity, and above all, the awful sweat you would pour on us. You didn't care that we needed long pants and sleeves to tastefully cover all the bits that bulged instead of caved. Summer was a bad time to be fat.
UNTIL NOW.
Now, we are feeling stronger every day. Now, we wear tank tops that reveal our fat arms and back fat. Now, we wear shorts that expose that weird bit of fat on the side of the knee.
BUT, now we are also uncovering more problems that we never even knew existed.
1) Body-shaming:
Of course, we were always victims of this before, but we were also perpetrators. By hiding our fat and being ashamed of our bodies, we reinforced the idea that fat bodies should be disguised. By comparing ourselves to other fat women by saying "at least we aren't THAT fat," we perpetuated stereotypes about women shaming women and the idea that criticizing another person's body makes yours better.
Now, we are seeing this phenomenon through a completely different lens.
As body positive activists we now know that body shaming is wrong on every level, and that hiding our bodies for the wrong reasons is an act of body shaming in itself. If you don't like wearing shorts and tanks in the summer because you prefer pants and long sleeves, there's nothing wrong with that. However, if you are only wearing clothes that cover up your body because you are ashamed of it and you feel that it is unworthy in the eyes of others, you are wearing those clothes for the wrong reasons. (This obviously excludes those who have undergone emotional trauma related to clothing choices and are still processing those experiences). We now know that we can be beautiful no matter what we wear, and that as fat women we prefer the comfort and coolness of shorts and tanks. In turn, we do not tear down women for their clothing choices, regardless of how they are dressed or what body type they have. In fact, if a fat woman wears long pants in the summer we don't automatically assume that she is ashamed of her legs...we assume that she enjoys wearing long pants. (What a radical notion!) At the same time, if anyone chooses their clothing on the basis of feeling that they will be shamed, then we do hope that they can overcome this.
Just as we fully believe "Other women are not [our] competition. [We] stand with them, not against them," we believe that Other bodies are not our competition, either.
It took a long time for the BB and the WW to stop body shaming themselves and others. As with all parts of the BoPo movement, it is a journey, and it is very personal. We write from personal experiences so that our readers can empathize and hopefully gain insight and ideas in how to proceed with their journeys, but at the same time we acknowledge the personal and private nature of the BoPo path. Thus, we consciously stop ourselves from comparing our bodies and our own ideals for our bodies to other people, because it is always bad activism to make yourself feel better by belittling someone else.
Finally, we just want to add that we write through the lens of fat feminists, but we also acknowledge and appreciate the plights of fat men, as well. During the summer especially it can be difficult for fat men to be respected when people make fun of their "bitch tits" or "man boobs." This is a great example of why men need feminism just as much as women and all other genders do. Fat men are demeaned by being called women when they have visible breasts. Even in jest this is body shaming and it needs recognition and activism, too.
2. Slut Shaming:
Summertime, you are infamous as the season of slut shaming, but even all year 'round women of all ages are judged for their clothing. Why is it ever okay to make a judgement about someone's sexuality, lifestyle, personality, or personal preferences based on their clothing? It isn't!
If women wear their bikinis in the summer they even face judgements at the beach sometimes...unless, of course, they are participating in a wet t-shirt/bikini contest. Then it's all good! This conditions women to compare themselves to one another and forces them to consider their bodies as objects for the male gaze.
During other seasons young girls are taught to be ashamed of their bodies by public school dress codes. Dress code rules are typically much more strict for girls than they are for boys, and instead of teaching students to embrace their bodies and respect one another's bodies, girls are instead taught that their cleavage is disruptive and their short shorts are distracting. In turn, boys are taught that a woman's clothing can identify her as a "slut" as opposed to a person dressing for the temperature.
All-in-all, slut shaming is another form of body shaming that is also related to rape culture and victim blaming, and Summertime brings many of those issues out into the open as women dress *gasp* for the weather.
Despite these challenges, we will continue to be proud and fat feminists who dress for the weather. We will embrace the tan lines that will now be on our thighs instead of our ankles. We will swim in public places in our cute swimsuits without worrying about everyone judging our bodies.
Most of all, we will not discount the importance of discussing issues like these. Because there are so many facets of body politics it sometimes seems frivolous to some to focus on something like clothing. However, as Body Proud activists who have lived as fat feminists, we know that clothing choices go so much further than a piece of cloth covering the skin. Clothing choices reflect identity and often how we communicate that identity to others. Clothing choices also reflect the implicit cultural shaming of othered bodies as well as the counterculture that seeks to reverse those stigmas.
So thank you Summer, for giving us a reason to wear our shorts confidently and our swimsuits smugly. Oh, and to completely subvert the idea of "dressing for your body type."
Sincerely,
The BB and WW
While we have learned to love our bodies and we welcome the thigh-chafing temperatures that you bring, we do not welcome the body shaming, slut shaming, and strict dress codes that are socially imposed upon us during the season. They are a glaring reminder of what happens more subtly all year long.
We used to dread the gifts you would bring - the excessive heat, crippling humidity, and above all, the awful sweat you would pour on us. You didn't care that we needed long pants and sleeves to tastefully cover all the bits that bulged instead of caved. Summer was a bad time to be fat.
UNTIL NOW.
Now, we are feeling stronger every day. Now, we wear tank tops that reveal our fat arms and back fat. Now, we wear shorts that expose that weird bit of fat on the side of the knee.
BUT, now we are also uncovering more problems that we never even knew existed.
1) Body-shaming:
Of course, we were always victims of this before, but we were also perpetrators. By hiding our fat and being ashamed of our bodies, we reinforced the idea that fat bodies should be disguised. By comparing ourselves to other fat women by saying "at least we aren't THAT fat," we perpetuated stereotypes about women shaming women and the idea that criticizing another person's body makes yours better.
Now, we are seeing this phenomenon through a completely different lens.
As body positive activists we now know that body shaming is wrong on every level, and that hiding our bodies for the wrong reasons is an act of body shaming in itself. If you don't like wearing shorts and tanks in the summer because you prefer pants and long sleeves, there's nothing wrong with that. However, if you are only wearing clothes that cover up your body because you are ashamed of it and you feel that it is unworthy in the eyes of others, you are wearing those clothes for the wrong reasons. (This obviously excludes those who have undergone emotional trauma related to clothing choices and are still processing those experiences). We now know that we can be beautiful no matter what we wear, and that as fat women we prefer the comfort and coolness of shorts and tanks. In turn, we do not tear down women for their clothing choices, regardless of how they are dressed or what body type they have. In fact, if a fat woman wears long pants in the summer we don't automatically assume that she is ashamed of her legs...we assume that she enjoys wearing long pants. (What a radical notion!) At the same time, if anyone chooses their clothing on the basis of feeling that they will be shamed, then we do hope that they can overcome this.
Just as we fully believe "Other women are not [our] competition. [We] stand with them, not against them," we believe that Other bodies are not our competition, either.
It took a long time for the BB and the WW to stop body shaming themselves and others. As with all parts of the BoPo movement, it is a journey, and it is very personal. We write from personal experiences so that our readers can empathize and hopefully gain insight and ideas in how to proceed with their journeys, but at the same time we acknowledge the personal and private nature of the BoPo path. Thus, we consciously stop ourselves from comparing our bodies and our own ideals for our bodies to other people, because it is always bad activism to make yourself feel better by belittling someone else.
Finally, we just want to add that we write through the lens of fat feminists, but we also acknowledge and appreciate the plights of fat men, as well. During the summer especially it can be difficult for fat men to be respected when people make fun of their "bitch tits" or "man boobs." This is a great example of why men need feminism just as much as women and all other genders do. Fat men are demeaned by being called women when they have visible breasts. Even in jest this is body shaming and it needs recognition and activism, too.
2. Slut Shaming:
Summertime, you are infamous as the season of slut shaming, but even all year 'round women of all ages are judged for their clothing. Why is it ever okay to make a judgement about someone's sexuality, lifestyle, personality, or personal preferences based on their clothing? It isn't!
If women wear their bikinis in the summer they even face judgements at the beach sometimes...unless, of course, they are participating in a wet t-shirt/bikini contest. Then it's all good! This conditions women to compare themselves to one another and forces them to consider their bodies as objects for the male gaze.
During other seasons young girls are taught to be ashamed of their bodies by public school dress codes. Dress code rules are typically much more strict for girls than they are for boys, and instead of teaching students to embrace their bodies and respect one another's bodies, girls are instead taught that their cleavage is disruptive and their short shorts are distracting. In turn, boys are taught that a woman's clothing can identify her as a "slut" as opposed to a person dressing for the temperature.
All-in-all, slut shaming is another form of body shaming that is also related to rape culture and victim blaming, and Summertime brings many of those issues out into the open as women dress *gasp* for the weather.
Despite these challenges, we will continue to be proud and fat feminists who dress for the weather. We will embrace the tan lines that will now be on our thighs instead of our ankles. We will swim in public places in our cute swimsuits without worrying about everyone judging our bodies.
Most of all, we will not discount the importance of discussing issues like these. Because there are so many facets of body politics it sometimes seems frivolous to some to focus on something like clothing. However, as Body Proud activists who have lived as fat feminists, we know that clothing choices go so much further than a piece of cloth covering the skin. Clothing choices reflect identity and often how we communicate that identity to others. Clothing choices also reflect the implicit cultural shaming of othered bodies as well as the counterculture that seeks to reverse those stigmas.
So thank you Summer, for giving us a reason to wear our shorts confidently and our swimsuits smugly. Oh, and to completely subvert the idea of "dressing for your body type."
Sincerely,
The BB and WW
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)